White Rose
by strawberrymint
Summary: KURAMA and BOTAN fic. In this story, Botan remembered the past she shared with Kurama.


Note: This is Botan's POV. In this story, the characters have no powers. They're just an ordinary ningen.  
  
' ' - thoughts  
  
disclaimer: I do not own the characters I used in this story.  
  
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"White Rose"  
  
There's a story that I have told my grandchildren. A story that I cherished deep within my heart, a story that I will never forget.  
  
Back in my high school days, I remembered that I had many suitors. But one of them became my true friend...Kurama. Everytime I hear that name I regain my self-confidence. It was because everytime I needed someone to talk to, it was he who bothered to advise me in anyway he could.  
  
He was still there even when I accepted Koenma as my boyfriend. There was also a time that I got angry with him. But he said, "I will always love you and I will be at your side even though I am only a friend in your eyes." His words struck my heart, I wondered if I would be happier with him. But Koenma was there and he was the man I dreamed to have. I must be happy.  
  
Koenma was one of the heartthrobs of our school, like Kurama. Many girls were longing to have him, especially Ayame. Like her, I was one of them. I thought that when he proposed to me was the time I found true love. But I was wrong. I was only a plaything for him and he would leave if he didn't need me anymore.  
  
One time, I saw him with Ayame. The sight was a nightmare but I was a fool to love him still. The tears in my eyes fell but someone gave me his hanky. It was Kurama. I admitted to myself that I missed him after a long time of refusing him. Maybe I was refusing his love, trying my best to remain faithful to Koenma even though he wasn't. I knew it.  
  
"Why do you still love him?" he asked.  
"Because I've loved him ever since I saw him and now that he's my boyfriend, I will never let him go."  
"Even though he's hurting you?"  
  
When he said those words, I looked into his eyes unconsciously. His eyes were full of pain to see me suffering. At that moment, I felt secure that I was the only girl in the heart of a man whom I was trying to love.  
  
Suddenly, he stood up. I was still staring at him then later he surprised me with his newly picked white roses. I was stunned at what saw. How did he know my favorite roses? Then he hugged me when he noticed that my loneliness had faded with those flowers.  
  
"Why?" I asked him.  
"What are you talking about?"  
"The hug?"  
"I was familiar with the girl who like white roses so much. But unfortunately..."  
"Unfortunately..." I interrupted.  
"I don't remember her face. I even asked my parents about her but they didn't know her."  
  
Months passed ever since that conversation and we became best friends. My feelings for him had developed. Even though I had a boyfriend, I was spending more time with Kurama. No matter what the whole crowd might say, I was making a new start...a new start with Kurama. He's right...I didn't have to be a martyr. But a shocking story happened.  
  
One day when he invited me to dine in their place, the tragedy happened.  
His house was a big one, as beautiful as a castle. I knocked at the door.  
  
"Botan, it's you!"  
"Why are you so surprised?"  
"Nothing, it's just that, you look beautiful tonight!"  
  
I didn't expect him to appreciate my dress but I noticed that he was so grateful of my presence.  
  
"Come in," he invited.  
Suddenly, his head ached. He was crying in the agony of pain. He almost stumbled on the floor. I screamed. I panicked.  
  
"Hold on, Kurama. I'll call your mother."  
It's like he never heard me. Then hours later the hell in his house left my memory. I closed my eyes and slept. I dreamed of him and the place where we talked and knew each other thoroughly. He's holding white roses, giving to a girl with no face. She's beautiful even if her face was blurred. When the white roses were at her hands, her face became clearer until I would see her. I knew her. It was...  
  
"Botan!"  
"Mrs. Minamino, I'm sorry. What happened to your son?"  
"The cancer in his brain had developed. He will only last for months. He didn't tell you because he didn't want to lose you. He still hoped that one day, you would love him not as a friend but as a lover. He knew that you would go back to Koenma if you knew what would happen to him."  
  
'What happened? Is this true? No, it's just another bad dream. Please Kurama...wake up.' I was shocked with what his mother said. I just went to the CR for privacy and then cried as hard as I could. I noticed that everything was blurred. I checked myself in the mirror. The girl who received white roses in my dream...she was me!  
  
"Why did you never tell me?" I asked.  
"I don't want you to be hurt."  
"Exactly...I may return to Koenma if I want to and besides I don't..."  
"You will never love me. I knew it. And the truth is I am selfish. I know you love him still and you will leave as soon as you want to."  
"I am going home now. It is very late."  
  
"Botan..."  
  
He called my name. Why did he other? He is the same as Koenma. He really didn't love me.  
'I will always love you and I be at your side.'  
  
At last, I'm home. It's dark and cold. Kurama...how dare I left him. I opened the door but a voice interrupted.  
"Botan...where were you? I've been waiting for you."  
"Koenma."  
He hugged me and then cried. He said he realized how much he loved me. Then he proposed...  
  
"I want you to be the mother of my children."  
'Even though I am only a friend in your eyes.'  
"I love you, too."  
"It's the day...the day before my wedding. Kurama...the boy who bothered to love me."  
I went to the hospital seeing him there. Oh my God, his face was not as bright as before. He couldn't smile the way he used to smile at me.  
"Sorry Kurama..." I was crying when I spoke those words.  
"Botan, you came back to me." His voice, which used to be jolly, was weak.  
"Hush, I will be Koenma's wife tomorrow."  
"So be it. Be happy with him."  
"When I will be in heaven, I will guide you everywhere."  
"The girl you used to bring white roses is..."  
"Botan, I love you."  
"ME!"  
  
He closed his eyes. I  
thought he was sleeping.  
"I love you too. Please don't leave me."  
I begged him softly. Hugging him, I realized the time he was there for me, in times of trouble and fortune. I closed my eyes.  
  
"Oh it's morning...Wedding day."  
I looked at Kurama.  
"Kurama, wake up. I will be leaving."  
He remained his eyes closed. He's cold.  
"Kurama, wake up."  
I started shaking him.  
"Please don't leave me. Please! A doctor..."  
Don't leave me!  
"I'm sorry. Everything, everyone has an end..." the doctor said.  
' I love you and will be at your side even though I am only a friend in your eyes.'  
'But you didn't do it.' I thought to myself crying.  
  
"Do you accept Koenma as your lawful husband?" the priest asked.  
"Kurama, is it you?" I blinked.  
"Koenma...no Botan, Kurama is gone." A voice inside me explained.  
"Botan...do you..." the priest asked again.  
"Yes...Father."  
  
_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-Back to the present-_-_-_- _-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_  
  
"Is Kurama my grandfather then?" a little Kagero asked. "Kagero...Grandma is weak, she needs a rest," his mother interrupted.  
  
His mother was my daughter. She knew that his father and I long divorced.  
  
I looked at the stars and slowly closed my eyes. I saw white roses on the pathway. There he is...Kurama was waiting for me.  
  
"Welcome Botan!" "Kurama...I never admitted it" "But I know. I love you and I will be at your side..." "Even death...FOREVER..." I concluded  
  
He kissed me and those white petals were showering us. I realized that tru love has no end. It will wait, even until death.  
  
The song Journey is played. This is the song that they dedicate to all the things they've encountered when they were still alive.  
  
JOURNEY  
  
It's a long long journey  
  
Till I know where I'm supposed to be  
  
It's a long long journey  
  
And I don't know if I can believe  
  
When shadows fall and block my eyes  
  
I am lost and know that I must hide  
  
It's a long long journey  
  
Till I find my way home to you  
  
Many days I've spent  
  
Drifting on through empty shores  
  
Wondering what's my purpose  
  
Wondering how to make me strong  
  
I know I will falter I know I will cry  
  
I know you'll be standing by my side  
  
It's a long long journey  
  
And I need to be close to you  
  
Sometimes it feels no one understands  
  
I don't even know why  
  
I do the things I do  
  
When pride builds me up till I can't see my soul  
  
Will you break down these walls and pull me through?  
  
Cause It's a long long journey  
  
Till I feel that I am worth the price  
  
You paid for me on calvary  
  
Beneath those stormy skies  
  
When Satan mocks and friends turn to foes  
  
It feel like everything is out to make me lose control  
  
It's a long long journey  
  
Till I find my way home to you.to you  
  
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Nadarelle's note: I hope you like the story I wrote! Review please. I just like to know your comments, suggestion, etc.  
  
Don't forget to drop by in my website! (I dedicate this website to Kurama and Botan)  
  
http://www.freewebs.com/damselle 


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